Friday, October 3, 2008

The Nut House

I'm not sure where to begin.

My house is crazy.

Let's set the scene. I'm making dinner in the kitchen.

My elderly father, who lives with us, comes squeaking in with his rollator
to fix himself a drink...a special concoction of ice cream and Crystal Lite.

Did I mention he's diabetic?

He's gotten very spiritual in his old age
and if you're not careful, he'll corner you and go on and on about the newest guru he's reading.
Regular religion is not enough for him.
He's enjoys doom & gloom, conspiracy theories and esoteric avatars to follow.

His shirt is stained with Crystal Lite, but he can't see it, because he's practically blind.

I point out that his shirt is dirty, and this is what he tells me,
"It's a new design. It's the Father, Son & the Holy Spirit."

And then he precedes to laugh, until the point of choking, at his own "joke."

I tell him it's a good thing he finds himself entertaining.

He heads back to his room, chuckling, where his TV is louder than a full marching band.

Next, there's Donny.
He's doing his homework, part of which consists of trombone practice.
He only knows a note or two, and I have to admit, it sounds like a dying cow.

Then there's Remy. He's either with me or Donny, never alone.

And he's always up to something.

He's been lying a lot lately. He's admitted he likes to tell stories.
I told him I like his creativity, but that I need to know when he's telling the truth or not.

He just smiles.

I'm in so much trouble with him.

Then there's Texas Home Boy, who's off watching
Mad Money or The Daily Show in our bedroom.
Or some horrible gangster movie with violence and cussing that scares the kids.

When I show up with my camera, I get THE LOOK.

You know, this one:

And, Annie, sweet Annie, just looks at me in confusion.

I know, Annie, this IS a nut house.
She follows me around, hoping I'm going to pick up her leash and my keys so we can go for a ride.

Sorry, Annie, someone's gotta keep these guys in line. It's up to you and me, sista.

I think I had a point with this story, but I've already forgotten it.

Scary, huh?
If you stand too close to me, I might rub off on you.
No, not rub ON you.
Get your mind out of the gutter!

I was telling someone today (can't remember who) that sometimes creativity strikes me upside the head with a steel bar,
but other times it sneaks up on me, pulls my pants down and laughs at me.

See, I told you this was a NUT HOUSE.

So, let's have a giveaway!!

I just finished reading a GREAT book, and I want to share it with you.

I'm willing to pass it on, because I want to share my addiction love of reading with others.

So, leave me a comment if you want to win!
Leave me a comment even if you don't want to win.
I love comments.
They make my day.

Did you know you don't have to have a Google account to leave a comment?
You can comment as "anonymous" or just put in a name, any name.

Stephenie Meyer, the fabulous author of the Twilight series, wrote this book also:

I'm not a real big science fiction reader, but this book, The Host, ROCKED MY WORLD.

It's Friday, thank goodness.

What does the weekend hold for you?
In what way is your house a Nut House?
Do you want this book?

Oh, yeah, this giveaway ends...whenever I feel like it.
That's how I roll right now.


cheatymoon said...

Oh, Rhea, your family is so sweet. The best thing to know is that everyone's family is a bit nutty. If it weren't nutty, it would be boring.

We are celebrating my almost 13 yr old's this weekend. We were both obsessed w/ Twilight this summer. Would love to check out the Host.

Have a fabulous weekend.

Justine said...

Ooh, I want that book!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OKay, you should keep your dad away from the ice cream if he's diabetic! In fact, don't keep it in the house. FAther, Son and Holy Spirit on his shirt? Har har har!
Madison is a lying machine too and it just drives me crazy. I always wind up catching her, but she still keeps doing it. Me: "Madison, did you brush your teeth?" Madison: "Yes, I did." Me: "Well, you were too quick about it. Go do it again." Madison: I'm done Mommy!" Fast forward a few hours. I'm in the bathroom and notice her toothbrush is dry, and the tooth paste is in a spot she couldn't reach. BUSTED! But of course she lied to my face at first and told me she DID brush her teeth. Little booger!

Justine :o )

Unknown said...

Nut house....

My house is a nut house but there's too much snot in my head to make a cohereant sentance. my weekend holds time in our storage until looking for Essie's old winter clothes for Gert to wear and also look for anything else that might catch my eyes...

I do want that book. I want that book and some bubble bath and 3 hours alone in the tub. Is that too much to ask?

Your dad is too dang cute.

All Things BD said...

My house is a nut house because I'm sick. And when I'm sick, the world apparently grinds to a screeching halt and nothing gets done. Kids can't figure out how to pick up their own junk and The Man can't figure out how to wash a dish or take out the trash.

Can you tell I'm a happy camper today? :)

How did I not know your Dad lives with you? He's too awesome.

Keys to the Magic Travel said...

Having a parent in your house is interesting, isn't it? I cannot stand the volume that my mother insists on having on the tv. She says it's because the girls are so loud. Well...that might be true at first, but eventually they've gone to bed. And to sleep. And that volumne is still up there.

I keep telling her that when she retires she MUST get a job because she'd make me crazy being underfoot all day.

Oh, and the lying. Madalyn came home the other day with this elaborate story about how she won the class spelling bee. And what the words were. And who spelled and didn't spell things. And so I said I was going to email the teacher to find out if second grade was going to be in the school spelling bee - and would her teacher know what I was talking about. Apparently not only did Madalyn not win the class bee, there was no bee.

Nik said...

It's a darn good thing you have a female dog because with all of that loudness, cluelessness and maleness - your house IS a nut house.

Our house is always crazy - but I think one of the parakeets has a crush on me because anytime I walk by, get up from my desk (their cage is right next to my desk) he starts chirping really loud as to say "Don't GO!!"...and if I grab my car keys..ROFL...what a dork bird.

This weekend we have to tag team sports - Itchy has a 9:30 soccer game by here and Cowboy has a 10:30 football game on the other side of town where we need to be by 9:15 for weigh in and warm up. Sunday we have bible study (Cowboy is taking Friend-girl to his class) and church....after that lunch and onto a birthday party (ACK I NEED TO BUY A GIFT!). Somewhere in there, I need to get some sleep.

OOOH - I like Lizzy's idea - a nice warm bath and a book. AHHHHHH

Ronnica said...

Sounds like things are always interesting! I remember when my brother was learning to play the trombone...torturous!

Oh, and I'm not interested in the book giveaway, but I did want to stop by and say "hey" and "thank you" for your part in making my day of SITS love great!

Jennifer said...

I LOVED your post today!! :) Well I usually always enjoy/love your posts... but this one made me feel good... comfortable... and happy.





:) yay!!

I'm not the only one who lives in a NUT house!! Full of people and NOISE and crazy things!! :) I LOVE it. I also loved all the pictures to go along with it. And each picture really projected exactly what you told about the person!! :) ESPECIALLY REMY!! that little devil!! lol He is so darn cute that it is almost impossible, I bet, to get angry with him for his tall tales! ;)

My house is beyond the NUT HOUSE... it is a totally disfuncional CRAZY house that is torn apart with about 1/5 of it packed in boxes and stacks of stuff here and there and every where to pack... a few hundred toys sprinkled around to make sure you have to really be agile to get through ANY room in the house... even the bathroom!! THREE kids running around... one of them who is sick and can't go to school... coughing and sneezing and boogers AND slight temp... OH MY!! TWO girls that think their birthday party is EVERY. SINGLE. DAY they wake up!! AND then fuss and cry when they are told they still have to wait... thank God it is FINALLY TOMORROW!! YAY! We also have Zoe Girl... she is a good girl and out of everyone in this house she does listen the BEST... but she likes to get wild with the kids... they are all bad infulences on one another... plus I think she is sensing the move b/c she is crammed up my rear end.. any where I go... she is THERE. I turn around she is THERE. I move forward she is THERE... well you get the point. I have some things that I want to sell from our house before we move... that ain't happening... but I'll pretend I might get to listing them on Craig's List... I still have to pack the 4/5ths that are left in the house... and weed through everything that I'm going to pack to throw out, donate, or give away what we don't want or need. I only have TWO boxes today to pack with... I'm running LOW!! :( We have ONE month to make the other house liveable... wow. ONE month. and while cleaning, painting and remodeling the ENTIRE downstairs of the house... we have to pack and clean this one!! OH joy!! My kids are SUPER excited to move!! :) So am I. So is Bryan. We have the girls' party this weekend next wkend we have a break, then we have three bday parties in a row... two for our neices and one for my BFF. AND we have to move and repair and do everything in ONE month to move!!
And we have THREE kids. And they are 5 and under!! AND we have twin girls that like to Bring On the DRAMA... and really whine a lot and also like to scream... usually happy, playful screams, that still DRIVE me nuts... and a very crazy, wild, active BOY that likes to make his sisters scream! :)

YES this permanent smile/grin on my face is there b/c of shock and b/c ...










oh!! and yeah... I would love to read another book by Stephanie.. I LOVED the twilight series, I cannot wait to see the movie although the movie is NEVER as good as the book... never ever!! at least not in my opinion. BUT having a book to read would maybe calm me down some... yeah. right but it was worth the thought... and I know for sure I would enjoy it...


sorry for the rambling... but in all fairness you asked how crazy my house was, or if I lived in a NUT house too... didn't you?? Oh you didn't mean you wanted EVERY. SINGLE. DETAIL. of my life?? OH!! sorry. My bad!!


Plus I haven't been over in a while so I owed you some good comment LOVE!! :)

xoxoxoxo have a great day... and IF I don't get back here sooner than next week, have an AWESOME WEEKEND!!

crystal light and ice cream ???

hmmm. interesting.

Kat said...

o o o I so want to read that book. I read the twilight series and was totally hooked. Goody goody gumdrops I hope I win! *tries to hide further excitement*

Emily said...

So funny Rhea. Seriously.

Sorry I have been a bad bloggy friend lately. Forgive me.

Lisa said...

Fabulous post.

Katie said...

Ok, I totally can't compete with Jennifer's comment :) but what a good post. I can't come up with a reason that I live in a nut house because after my husband's family left, it's more like a 'sesame seeds are sticking to the bottom of my feet" kind of house.
Is there a cure for bagel addiction?

Jennifer and Sandi said...

Pick me, Pick me, Pick me!!!!

Annie sure does look like a stress reliever!! Gotta love her!!


- Jennifer

Anonymous said...

It is going to be a very busy weekend.

Tonight I'm cleaning house. My wonderful friend Wanda is coming to my house tomorrow morning so I can cut a christmas tree out of sheet metal for her. Then at 11 we'll drive 100 miles to watch our nephew play flag football. Can you imagine how cute that will be watching a slug of 7 year olds playing flag football. After the game we are celebrating my SIL's 40th bday. Then it's off to Home Depot to buy new baseboards for the living room. Sunday I plan on painting those baseboards and helping the hubby cut trees down. On top of all that I have to babysit our new puppy 24-7. So I think that qualifies our house as a crazy place!

sassy stephanie said...

I love all of these pics. Your dad must be a hoot to have around.

As for the book, I have been wondering if it was as awesome as the Twilight series. I am about 100 pages into BD. The Host is on my list of reads after the


Anonymous said...

My house is a nut house, with two preschoolers running around, but I can't compete with trombones and stuff.

Also? I love that your dad take the sugar free crystal light and adds ice cream to it. That's freaking awesome.

Have a great weekend!

Claremont First Ward said...

I think I may have already mentioned that I loved The Host too. In fact, it's the reason I read the Twilight Series. I wasn't going to.

Love the picture of Texas Home Boy. When I come near my husband he flips me off. Weird. j/k.

My house is like a nut house.....I can't even tell you in how many ways. I have told you I'm moving, right?

Mama Dawg said...

I want to read that one, too. I've read the other 4 already (reading BD for the second time right now).

My house it literally a nut house since I got the squirrel.

But, I like the crazy. Just as long as it doesn't happen every day.

Anonymous said...

My house,home at 8 from work, no dinner, daughter wants me to fix her hair for the school photo, so does son who has buzz cut and has not finished homework though it is bedtime, husband watching recorded debates with a focused intensity, I am hungry, tired, roll into bed at 9, just to feel the dark peace.

Anonymous said...

Whoa! I also played the trombone as a youth. 'Dying cow' was my nickname in high school ;). I was totally vindicated when Jonathan Frakes played one on Star Trek, though. Your house looks NORMAL compared to mine :D. Great pics. Please sign me up for the contest!

Unknown said...

Awwww, your father is adorable. I really loved your post today. You always amaze me.

I am up to relaxation this weekend. It was a stressful week!

My house is in a tree that is how nutty we are...but I am the Princess Squirrel.

Enjoy your weekend.

scargosun said...

I don't think our house qualifies as a nut house becuase my husband actually drives me's not a natural occurance. You know what I mean?

Captain Dumbass said...

I have three and five year old boys so you already know how nuts my house is. To top it off I'm getting paid to stay home for a year and be a stay at home dad. WOOT!

And now that I've seen your dad's beard and I am unemployed, I'm totally growing one of those.

Live.Love.Eat said...

OK I still get a chuckle anytime a woman says "that's how I roll." I want to say it sooo bad on my blog and am waiting for the right time. Ha ha. ANyhoo, your writing is getting more & more creative. You been taking classes?

I don't want this book really (not for me) but I did want to comment anyway. Your Dad seems hilarious and your house does seem like a nut house but a fun lovin one!

Kally said...

I bet the Kally Casa will look like a looney bin also this winter. The Mr's grandmother will be visiting. She brings with her at least 536 harlequin romance books and the regularly turns the TV up so loud the neighbors down the street can hear it. Here's hoping you can find some sanity even if it is in sweet Annie's look of confusion.

Would love the book. I am always looking for something new to read.

Anonymous said...

hey rhea! thanks for stopping by my blog - and i totally relate to your nut house. sounds like home sweet home to me. :) between my husband of 6 years, son of 9 months, and dog of 75 pounds, there's plenty of craziness around here!

Karen said...

Oh, I definately get the nut house thing. I will posting about something similar to that this weekend. It seems my son has had some confusion between grass and carpet. Yeah, it's been that week.

I have read that book, too. One of my favorites. I think I liked it better than the Twilight series. Where did it rank for you?

Hang in there Annie and Rhea, we are pulling for your sanity.

Mind of MadMan said...

I live here.. Isn't that enough?

KP said...

i am pretty much obsessed with the twilight series. i read the first three books in three days and am on the last one (breaking dawn) and i'm trying to read it as slowly as i can, and i'm already sad that i'm almost done. it's such a good series, and who would have thought? "um, it's about this girl who falls in love with a vampire..." she goes into such detail and i love it. i'm glad you like the host, i've been thinking of reading it. is it similiar to the twilight books? is it part of a series? i'm going to need some serious distraction when im done with breaking dawn, it's so good!

KP said...

i am pretty much obsessed with the twilight series. i read the first three books in three days and am on the last one (breaking dawn) and i'm trying to read it as slowly as i can, and i'm already sad that i'm almost done. it's such a good series, and who would have thought? "um, it's about this girl who falls in love with a vampire..." she goes into such detail and i love it. i'm glad you like the host, i've been thinking of reading it. is it similiar to the twilight books? is it part of a series? i'm going to need some serious distraction when im done with breaking dawn, it's so good!

Ali said...

i really want to read that!! (i'm a book addict too. we are twins. heh because my house? total nut house too!)

San said...

I'll vie for the book, Rhea. I love to win contests!

Your nut house sounds so much like my house. At least when kids lived here. My in-laws are 2 minutes away and they keep the nuttiness quotient HIGH. Your dad is a cutie.

Susie said... mom lives with us and she is diabetic too. She hids grahmn crackers in her room and then wonders why her blood sugar is 200! Raising parents is so hard.

Krystyn @ Really, Are You Serious? said...

A wedding for us to attend...that's about it.

Nut house...I have a 2 year old...that pretty much says it all!

CrystalChick said...

My house is crazy too. We have 2 families living in a small bungalow. It's been since last May so you'de think we'd be used to it by now. I guess how I've gotten used to things is that I don't clean alot anymore, and because my dining room is now my craft room I don't have big dinners either. We eat in shifts in the small eat in kitchen on half a table because the other half is filled with stuff... including assorted papers, things I don't want to lose but might as well be lost because I never sort thru the pile of clutter.
So yeah, we're crazy over here too. I keep saying when my daughter moves out I'm going to get totally organized and clean and cook on a regular schedule, but I feel like I'm really getting into a pattern, a definite lazy procrastinating pattern.
And when I can't take it, I head out the door and go to my fav place, order my fav drink and read some fav books. I'm living in denial and avoiding the issues.

Your giveaway is very cool, but I am going to pass this time. I really do enjoy reading and am a total book addict too, but I have many many books right now that I have to finish first.

Have a nice weekend. :)

Momma Trish said...

This weekend? My birth mom is coming up for a visit. I squeal with delight, as she is always so much fun to see! We will have fun.

My house is a nut house too. Usually because we commit ourselves to various activities, and then the unexpected happens and we end up struggling to do all the stuff we said we'd do. We have an "unexpected crap" target on our foreheads, apparently.

just a girl... said...

I wont beg for the book, although I am always looking for a good read. Stumbled on you today and glad I did. Austinite hear, hook em my friend. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE that freaking pink cowboy hat. nice to meet ya.

Anonymous said...

this weekend holds for me an all women's soccer tournament in sunny Santa Barbara, except, yeah, it will be raining one of those sunny days. i will be going with my girlfriends to escape the crazy that is my household. FREEDOM! (screamed in my best braveheart voice)


Erika Jean said...

TGIF! I could use a new book ;-)

steenky bee said...

I already won a giveaway so don't make me eligable, please. But I just wanted to say that I love that picture of your Dad. How cute is he? He's adorable. You know, Mama Dawg and Captain Dumbass keep talking about shipping their kids off to one another. Screw that noise. I'll take your father to live with me. Tell him a chick in Utah thinks he's adorable. Just don't show him the picture of me brushing my teeth.

Jen said...

that book is so on my list to read and I would love to have your copy but only if you would autograph it for my. I would treasure it always.
I loved this post and I was totally cracking up, now the patients are looking at me funny.

Shannon said...

Have you not seen the title of my blog? Hellllloooo....

J/K... but seriously, it is a perpetual nut house here. I've got a neurotic dog, kids falling asleep in the bathtub, a husband who rolls his eyes at me when I mention anything about blogging...

Angie and I are going to meet Kat for lunch tomorrow! So that will be the highlight of my weekend, I am sure. Sunday will probably just be a stay-at-home-and-do-laundry sort of day.

I've wondered if Host is as good as the Twilight series... so I've held off on buying it. Maybe I will win it from you! :)

Andrea said...

Your dad is so cute!!!

We are always nutty here with me triping over five kids and all...

Weekend plans: A Breast Cancer 2 km Walk, a football game (daughter cheering), and possibly a birthday party. Oh-and we might tackle cleaning out the storage room-or not.

Anonymous said...

Oh my goodness! I want this book so badly!

So this weekend is playing catch-up. Books need to be read (and reviewed hopefully), chores need to be done, and a bunch of little projects needs to be finished.


Anonymous said...

Awww your family is adorable. WELL, this weekend will hopefully mark the first time I cracked into my brand spankin new Prismacolor color pencil set. For a school project though :[

My house isn't much a nut house because no one lives here anymore! I am the only one left with my parents because all my siblings have moved out, but when we get together for special occasions, well, things get pretty wild. :D

I have been dying to read The Host! It is definitely a book that I've wanted for a while.


Anonymous said...

Hopefully I'll be able to relax a little this weekend. I'll probably have to edit some video footage, though.

My house back home is crazy because there are generally seven people and several pets living in it. My mom, sister, sister's husband, sister's two kids, me, my fiance, and our big dog Diesel, medium dog Angel, tiny dog Daisy, big cat Priss, and little kittens Max and Gizmo.

I've heard a lot about Twilight so I'm excited to read anything by Stephenie Meyer.

cherry said...

You had me at Twilight...I am an addict of the series. I have yet to read the put me in the hat! Thanks for coming by and saying hi from sits....your pop cracked me up....crystal lite...cherry

Anonymous said...

OMG Rhea, you crack me up EVERYTIME I read your blog;) LOL

Anonymous said...

Nothing's better than crazy though, you know? Normal would be boring!

OHmommy said...

It does not sound like a nut house. Sounds like some classy chaos. LOL.

YES. I want that book. I puffy heart reading.

Sally-Ann said...

I think living in a nut house is quite normal. Today my youngest is stealing the pumpkins I have by our front door and is tucking them into his bed. Our neighbors are paintballing their fence - I don't know why. We are trying to pack to go to Canada and I can't find the passports........tomorrow will be calm and I think I need a good book to read!

WheresMyAngels said...

What is a "rollator"?? lol

I'm needing a book to read. Course, I'm needing a maid worst, but I guess you aren't offering cleaning services also.

AdriansCrazyLife said...

I'm always up for a good book. My weekend consists of putting on bingo for about 60 people at my church, doing a bit of housework (not too much, it might be dangerous!) and getting my nails done. I also need to clean up my scrapbook room. It's also supposed to rain like a bugger all weekend. Good thing I like rain.

Pseudo said...

I've got a night stand piled with books that I haven't gotten to, so no need to put me in the contest. Just wanted to say I loved this post and your sharing your "nutty" family. Especially love the grin on your little one - yup you're in trouble. fun trouble I'm sure.

Unknown said...

Ooooohhh, yes count me in. I've been thinking of buying that book.

My house if half a Nut House these days, as it doesn't have the kid element. However I do have a husband , two dogs and a cat...

Years ago, when I first started posting to newsgroups on the internet my email address started with karen@madhouse ... I was looking through the google groups yesterday ...memories :-)

Included in my signature tag was 'If I'd wanted to live with clowns, I'd have joined a circus.' :-)

Kelly said...

Your Dad's drink sounds yummy...I know, I know ... not so much for a diabetic...He does sound like he adds to the fun in your nut house!!

Put my name in the contest please oh please...I loved the Twilight series and I have yet to peruse her other books...this would give me a jump start :)

KG said...


I live in a total nut house, too - a different type of nut house, but a nut house nevertheless.

And I'd love to read a good book - if the contest is still ongoing sign me up!

Brandy said...

Sometimes I think *I'm* the nut in my house. ~sigh~

Anyway I'm reading The Host now and it is fabulous and deserving of being passed along. I love Stephanie Meyer's writing style. She really pulls you in with all the details...I cannot wait for the next installment in the Twilight series.

Misty DawnS said...

Dangit!!! Story of my life - too busy working three jobs makes me miss out on ALL the good stuff! Man - if it's a book you truly loved, that means I'd probably love it too, cuz I love your personality and writing.

UGH - give me some sort of notice next giveaway, pppppplease. hehehe

Putting the FUN in DysFUNctional said...

You gotta know my house is a nut house. We do put the fun in dysFUNctional, after all. Right now there are 6 dogs, one cat, one fish, and four children. One sleep deprived mother, and one dad who just laughs at everything.
I love that picture of Remy, he looks SO mischievous!

Angie's Spot said...

I'll have to check out this book. I enjoyed Twilight. Always happy for book recommendations!