I don't speak car.

I'm so honored to be Quote of the Day over at Erin's blog. Thanks, Erin!

Pimped Out Toilets, Butt Facials and Boeing Bidets...Oh, My!

Under "Cool Inventions" in my son's National Geographic Kids Magazine is this Souped Up John (or put plainly, a pimped out toilet). It has a TV, a TiVo, a DVD player, Xbox 360, laptop, fridge, and a toilet paper holder that is also an iPod docking station. Also, in front are some pedals for working out and a megaphone to call for anything you need. Wow. Can anyone say overkill?

Did you hear about the constipated composer?

He couldn't finish the last movement.

To continue our rear end theme, here is a new fad across the good ole US of A: Butt facials. Have you had your hiney cleansed and exfoliated recently? I think that's enough said, don't you?

Incontinence Hotline...Can you hold, please?

I was trying to Google these fancy toilets in Japan that someone mentioned, but came across this instead: bidets for the new Boeings 787. Yikes. I'm not sure what I think about that. I'm all for cleanlyness but...

Well, did you hear about the constipated accountant?

He couldn't budget.

Did you know there is a toilet newsletter out there? They advertise as "World Bathroom and Toilet News and Etiquette." While reading this (yes, I can't sleep tonight), I learned about a resturant in Taiwan that has toilet chairs, urinal sconces, and even commode shaped serving pieces. Very unusual to say the least. I also read about something called the Dunny Derby, an Australian contest where 20 teams race around a track trying to be the fastest, and also to have the best looking dunny. Apparently dunny is the term for an outdoor toilet downunder. I like that term. I may start calling my toilet the dunny...

If you're an American when you go into the bathroom, and an American when you come out, what are you when you're in the bathroom?

Eur-o-pean.

Ok, enough for now. I promise my next post will contain much less potty humor.

It died...again.

It was ALIVE...

Rebel with a Cause

For those of you who have been reading for a while, you know my dad ended up in the hospital last week (and read his drugged conversation transcript). Well, he's home now and doing great! However, getting him home was a problem. This hospital was not big in speediness and competency, in my opinion. The doctor told him the night before that he was going to discharge him...but somehow they didn't actually sign the orders and let him go until 4pm the next day. He spent that whole time just sitting around, nothing happening. I went up there to pick him up and got very frustrated with the lack of communication and action.

So, I decided to rebel against the system. (This is not like me.) His nurse would disappear for hours on end, never helping my dad with the shower he'd been trying to get ALL day. I innocently asked the aid (who was super helpful), "Does it create a lot of extra paperwork if I just take him home on my own?"

And wouldn't you know it, the head nurse was in our room within 5 minutes, and we were out the door and discharged within 20 minutes. hehe

FYI, leaving the hospital like that would have been called AMA (Against Medical Advice) but since he was already told he was being discharged, and it was just taking TOO LONG, I figured we could get away with it.

I was seriously ready to just whisk him out of there. There's nothing to pulling out an IV, right?

Disclaimer: No old or sick people were offended in the publishing of this post. My dad gave his persmission to share the photo, which was taken right before the Great Evacuation of 2008 begin (you don't want to know, trust me).

It's Alive! Easter barf and a bride.

It's ALIVE!! My poor Land Rover (which is about 10 years old) has been out of commission for four months. Yes, FOUR MONTHS!! It blew a head gasket or something technical like that. I don't speak car, but my husband does, and he took on his monsterous project. It took him a while (have I mentioned he's an attorney, not a mechanic by trade?), and I drove the gnome mobile during that time but as of now, my Land Rover is alive again and ready to go! YAY! I've missed it. Yes, it's a gas guzzler, some of the windows don't work so well, the locks stick, the headliner's starting to fall, and the kids have done their best to trash the insides, but I love being high up and, most importantly, it's paid off!


Does your house look like this? Mine does...every room has a small pile of Easter-looking barf; broken plastic eggs, plastic grass, chocolate and candy wrappers. Colorful but messy.

Our sweet Annie, whom we adopted from DFW Lab Rescue this summer, is the love of our life. We spoil her and love her so much. This is her cushy couch-bed she got for Christmas...although she sleeps with my older son in HIS bed every night. So, maybe this is her daybed...

I had to share this next picture, because it is something I look at every day and can't live without. I had lap-band surgery back in November and have lost 30lbs so far. I still have more weight to lose, but it's a huge start. Anyway, I have to take in lots of protein every day, and the way I most enjoy doing this is with protein powder in my homemade smoothies. I'll have to share the recipe sometime soon, ,although it's super simple. Here is one, below, in my favorite Target cup:

Finally, I just couldn't resist sharing this portrait of me, in my wedding dress, taken almost 12 years ago! I can't believe it's been that long.

If you've made it this far down into the post, congrats! This was a long and random post today. The boys' Spring Break ended and they went back to school today. It was hard waking up early this morning. I worked all day as well, so I'm beat and trying to overcome a bad headache. I also banged my head on a cabinet trying to take a picture of the car in the garage. Sigh. The price I pay for my blog. lol

A Non-Easter Post

My boys are fascinated with space right now. Our home is filled with talk about dark matter, stars, space, aliens, and all that kind of stuff. When I posted earlier this week about SETI (Search for Extra-Terrestrial Intelligence) and the Hubble Telescope, reader Tez left me a comment informing me of Astronomy Photo of the Day, which is very cool! I'm learning a lot when I visit that site. They have a professional astronomer writing descriptions accompanying the photo of some part of the universe. Today's picture is of a dark molecular cloud, which is something I have personally never seen a picture of before. Do you like to learn about Space?

What am I reading right now? I sometimes have several books going and I go back and forth among them depending on my mood. I'm reading Eat, Pray, Love, which everyone seems wild about and is pretty good so far and I'm reading Black Magic Woman, for fun and to fufill my urban fantasy need. What are you currently reading?

In honor of my new poll on the left side of the screen, I'm going to share that I have never gone skinny-dipping as an adult. I did once as a child and it was a lot of fun! I was at my friend's house and she had an above-ground pool and we went swimming at night in the dark. So, no boys involved and we were kids. Not as much fun, I know. Have you gone skinny-dipping before?

A lot of churches have banned rice throwing at weddings. The story I heard was that birds will eat the rice off the ground and it will cause their stomaches to expand, exploding the bird. Lovely, huh? Well, it's a myth, busted by Mythbusters! Many churches have banned the rice mainly due to liability issues...they don't want people to fall and break something or hurt themselves on the slippery rice. At my wedding, we threw rose petals. What was thrown at your wedding?

The ringtone on my cell phone is AC/DC's Back in Black. What's your ringtone?

What's cooking in this pot?

Can you guess what's cooking in this pot?

Don't forget to check out my other blog.